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Signs of Distress

At one time or another, everyone feels depressed or upset. It is important to remember that just because a student appears to be experiencing one of the signs below it does not necessarily mean that he or she is in significant distress. However, if a student's distress appears to be severe, or you notice one or more of these signs over a prolonged period of time, then it may be necessary to intervene. If you have doubts or concerns about the seriousness of your student's problems, please consult with one of the staff members at the Counseling Center.

What Can You Do?

Remember to:

TALK to your student in private when both of you have the time and are not rushed or preoccupied.

LISTEN to thoughts and feelings in a sensitive, non-threatening way. Communicate understanding.

GIVE hope. It is important to help them realize there are options, and that things will not always seem hopeless. Suggest resources: friends, family, clergy, counselors.

AVOID judging, evaluating, and criticizing even if your student asks your opinion. Such behavior may push the student away from you and from the help he or she needs. It is important to respect your student's value system, even if you don't agree with it.

REFER: A referral for counseling may be made when your student's difficulties appear to go beyond your ability to help. In making a referral it is important to point out that: 1) help is available and 2) seeking such help is a sign of strength and courage rather than a sign of weakness or failure. If you can, prepare the student for what they might expect if they follow your suggestion. Tell them what you know about the referral person or service. Specify options they can consider. This can include using the Counseling Services. If the student is not ready to use professional counseling, some other sources of help may be useful (physicians, community support groups, Residence Life ADs, chaplain, relatives, etc.).

FOLLOW-UP with your student to solidify their resolve to obtain appropriate help and to demonstrate your commitment to assist them in this process. Check later with your student to see that the referral appointment was kept and to hear how it went. Provide support while your student takes further appropriate action or pursues another referral if needed.

CONSULT with a Counseling Center staff member (895-4292), the Dean of Students (895-4234), or your student’s Residence Life Assistant Director (895-4113) when you have questions or concerns about your student, or want to know about resources on and off campus.

What Happens to a Student at the Counseling Center?

Students make their own appointments. You can assist this process by providing the student with the Counseling Center phone number (895-4292; x4292 on campus). Students can also stop by the Counseling Center to schedule an appointment. Office hours are between 8:00 a.m. and 4:30 p.m., Monday through Friday, and new for 2005-06, extended hours are available on Tuesday by appointment only. A student can generally obtain an appointment within a day or two if they wish, but there may sometimes be a longer wait if demands for services are high.

At the first visit to the Counseling Center, the student completes information forms before meeting with a counselor (these will be waived temporarily in emergencies). During the initial interview, the counselor begins an assessment of the student's needs and the ways in which the Counseling Center might be able to help. If the student and the counselor agree that further counseling is appropriate, the student may be offered short-term individual counseling on campus. Some students are referred to other campus service departments or to community resources for specialized or continued counseling. Others may leave the initial interview feeling able to handle their problems on their own. Students can return to the Center if additional services would be useful.

On-campus counseling services are free and are confidential by law. What that means for you, as a parent, is that counselors cannot say whether or not they have met with your student. You may share any concerns or information with a counselor, but unless the counselor has written permission from a student he or she cannot provide specific information in return. However, a counselor can listen to your concerns and discuss options and/or resources with you. And remember, talking directly to your student is often the best way to understand what is going on in their life, and to express your concern and care for them.

Portions of this information have been adapted from
The George Washington University’s Counseling Center.

Listed below are links to some websites that you might find informative:

• College Parents of America: (www.collegeparents.org/)
  From the web page: "College Parents of America is the only national membership association dedicated to advocating and to serving on behalf of current and future college parents."