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Law Hall Moose Returns!


John Weber


The Law Hall moose, the last remaining original inhabitant of Law Hall, returned for mounting and the dedication of Moosehead Lounge, as well as a celebration of intellectual life at Cornell, on Nov. 3. The lounge is on the second floor of newly renovated Law Hall Technology Center.

According to a recent missive from the moose, he became depressed last year while isolated from the students who mean so much to him. To aid his recovery, he took a trip to Alaska, Nebraska, Colorado, the Grand Canyon, and Yellowstone, where he met Stella.

"Her eyes sparkle like stars on a cloudless winter night," he wrote. "Her coat looked if it were made of silk. To touch her was as close to absolute joy as is possible in this world. I finally found a soulmate. To find such perfection in this world! Ahh ... Stella. I could never leave Stella."

The moose convinced Stella to come to Mount Vernon and see Law Hall. He was greatly impressed by the renovations. With Stella at his side, the moose (who came to Cornell in the 1920s as part of the Law Hall Biological Museum) decided Cornell did not need him anymore. Stella got a job as a spokes-moose for a beer company, which involved eight to 10 public appearances a week.

 "After about two days, I became bored with the drinking and partying with no mental stimulation. I had not realized how much my conversations with students on topics in psychology, mathematics, physics, and computer science really meant to me," he wrote. "No matter how hard I tried to be one of the boys, I was clearly a moose out of water. I found myself going to the Web more and more often and checking out the term table to see what was going on in Law, even though the physicists were no longer in the building."

Meanwhile, Stella went on a drinking binge when the White Sox lost the playoffs. "There was no way I could console her, though I did try. She would just look at me with those beautiful eyes clouded by the beer and say I was a contemplative moose who cared more for the mind than the outcome of games," the moose wrote. "She quietly said I could never understand her and she never wanted to see me again."

The moose returned to Yellowstone to clear his head and settle his broken heart. He returned Nov. 3 because he was looking forward to conversation on Analysis, Calculus, Functions, Discrete Math, Psychology and particularly Psychology and the Law, all being taught third term in Law Hall.

"What an exciting place to be!" he wrote. "But I will ache for Stella, and hope no one in Law minds if I give a Tennessee Williams scream once in a while.".

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